These next few months are going to be “challenging”, shall we say? Absolutely nothing to do but keep moving forward - cringing in this recliner is counterproductive…
As Spock said: “I’ve been dead before“ - yep, plenty of difficult periods in my life but it’s as if this is the “uber-event”: bigger, scarier, even more ominous & threatening with my sub-optimal health. That towering tidal wave from “Interstellar” also looms in my mind - what could I have done to avoid this? I feel like the little Dutch boy with all my fingers and toes plugging holes in the dike!
For now I do what I can - robbing Peter to pay Paul (taking a disbursement from my retirement account, increasing my loan with the sharks), and applying for a small business grant from the city of Ferris. When I have a move-in date for our remodeled clinic, I can start marketing the mobile unit & the surgery trailer to generate some positive cash flow there.
Right now my mockingbird is singing his darling little heart out, and I need to get moving with my day. My mom fell in her bathroom yesterday morning - does not appear to be seriously injured but she is contemplating a move to the facility in Red Oak we had looked at but she considered “too expensive”. Another plate to spin/ball to juggle! But she couldn’t resist another dig at me - this place would be a little bit closer but “it isn’t as if you visit me much anyway!” There’s no point of me burdening my mother with my troubles but I’m doing the best I can - the whole purpose behind the assisted living facility was to relieve part of my burden.
((( hugs ))) I suppose saying "breathe" is not appropriate when one is underwater... Sending vibes of wisdom and patience and calm... which is hard when you're spinning those plates!
ReplyDeleteCovid is such a "B" of a disease that I don't know anyone who hasn't had it at this point. The last holdout friends of mine finally succumbed - Off goes the mask and down the throat goes Captain Trips. After my Long Hauler bout with it I have lived in fear of ever getting it again. I was hit most by the neurological symptoms after the respiratory stuff. The neuro nightmare totally kicked my confused, dizzy booty for months. So I have been dead before too. I don't want to push that lever again.
ReplyDeleteHopefully this work business will be straightened out soon and that will take a bunch of pressure off of you.
Mothers often tend to be that way. My mom was never satisfied. My fantasy dreams were like if Johnny Depp suddenly showed up and said, "I can't live another day without you! Let's go steady!" Hers were that Benny, Ian, and I would sell our home and move in with her (she had R.A. heart disease, on dialysis, non-weight bearing) AND with my senile, incontinent, non-weight bearing, blind grandmother. In her fantasy Benny, Ian (in grade school), and I would take care of them PLUS a few more invalids by ourselves in her 2 bedroom house. A wonderful 24/7 job for room and board. Sort of like a nursing home with wall to wall beds and no help. Hopefully while in Heaven God has helped MOM to see the lunacy in that or else he will have to ignore her too to stay sane. It would be nice if YOUR mom could see what an awesome child she raised.