It's great when I am able to get back to sleep after my typical middle-of-the-night potty break, but NOT so great when the alarm awakens me from deep sleep, dreaming of cleaning up Lego's while needing to go pick P up from the airport and dreading the thought of having my obligatory sexual encounter with him...
And speaking of Real Life, I need to cowgirl up and TRY a direct approach w/DH - so far minor displays of affection (snuggles in bed or couch, hugs and dry kisses) seem to have ZERO effect. "Put up or shut up", so to speak - if we're going to have a sexless marriage that actually doesn't bother me too much, my own libido has dried up and drifted away quite some time ago. But it would be nice to come to an understanding about such things - I would hope it isn't as some friends suspect, that P is getting ready for a major shift, as I eye the "Slimmer Belt" draped over the edge of the tub.
Everyone Pile On Now
Saturday, October 26, 2013
Wow, don't even know where to START this pity party, so I'd best just spit it out (like regurgitating a hairball, hopefully it'll make me feel better!)
My alternate title: "Be Careful What You Wish For"
Thurs night at Z's FB game (another loss, bummer! But they're still 6 - 2), Hubby unlocked his phone in full view of yours truly... This afternoon he left it unattended in my truck as he finished putting things away in the barn. I've been anxious to scan his msgs-to-brother ever since they both showed up to meet us at Grand Canyon acting guilty - T offered me a cool handshake when I haven't seen him in over 4 yrs, & P wouldn't look me in the eye! I know he took full advantage of his time w/bro to run down all the misery of being married to a middle-aged veterinarian...
At that time I couldn't confront P in front of friend Lucy, who thinks P walks on water. (as a childless spinster, I've offered to let her "borrow" P since dear L hasn't the foggiest clue as to what the realities of married life might be!) And ever since, "insert excuse": I'm too tired, too wrapped up in work/Z's school & FB schedule/trying to look after my aging parents - basically DON'T WANNA!!! I told P years ago, I'm ruined from too many late nights trying to save my 1st marriage - life is too short & if it gets to be too much hard work - too bad, so sad! Fundamentally I'm gonna protect myself & Z, that's all there is to it... It may sound cynical, but it is pure self-preservation.
I've attended two funerals this past week, neither one accompanied by my husband -this is obviously a two-way street on which both of us are responsible for walking away from one another. Tonight, for instance, I have quiet time to blog since he went to a neighborhood dinner which I declined to attend - just not this cowgirl's cup o' tea. I'm the first to admit, we're more like amiable roommates than husband & wife.
Anyway, enough beating around the bush - I snooped thru P's text msgs & instead of a lot of dirt w/bro (I suspect he got all that out in person ;-), I found this "friend" by the name of Edwina Gregorio! No, I don't think he's f**king her, but the emotional intimacy can cut just as deep. Many jokes made by her about her being too "old" for him... Been there, done that! (I know I've made allusions to the fact that She Who Shall Not Be Named is 10 yrs older than Ex, that makes her 14 yrs older than me... I've actually made that into my mantra of sorts: when I'm teetering on the knife-edge of making an unhealthy choice, I repeat to myself "14 yrs, 14 yrs" ! Cruel but effective)
Well I Googled this rival & got nowhere - I'm just not that skilled of a computer nerd. Got the bright idea that they might be FB friends, but no luck. Like it or not, I'm just going to have to ASK HUBBY. I ask for your support, dear SparkFriends, bcz this might just be the beginning of the end for Marriage #2. I may not beat those 70% failure statistics...
My alternate title: "Be Careful What You Wish For"
Thurs night at Z's FB game (another loss, bummer! But they're still 6 - 2), Hubby unlocked his phone in full view of yours truly... This afternoon he left it unattended in my truck as he finished putting things away in the barn. I've been anxious to scan his msgs-to-brother ever since they both showed up to meet us at Grand Canyon acting guilty - T offered me a cool handshake when I haven't seen him in over 4 yrs, & P wouldn't look me in the eye! I know he took full advantage of his time w/bro to run down all the misery of being married to a middle-aged veterinarian...
At that time I couldn't confront P in front of friend Lucy, who thinks P walks on water. (as a childless spinster, I've offered to let her "borrow" P since dear L hasn't the foggiest clue as to what the realities of married life might be!) And ever since, "insert excuse": I'm too tired, too wrapped up in work/Z's school & FB schedule/trying to look after my aging parents - basically DON'T WANNA!!! I told P years ago, I'm ruined from too many late nights trying to save my 1st marriage - life is too short & if it gets to be too much hard work - too bad, so sad! Fundamentally I'm gonna protect myself & Z, that's all there is to it... It may sound cynical, but it is pure self-preservation.
I've attended two funerals this past week, neither one accompanied by my husband -this is obviously a two-way street on which both of us are responsible for walking away from one another. Tonight, for instance, I have quiet time to blog since he went to a neighborhood dinner which I declined to attend - just not this cowgirl's cup o' tea. I'm the first to admit, we're more like amiable roommates than husband & wife.
Anyway, enough beating around the bush - I snooped thru P's text msgs & instead of a lot of dirt w/bro (I suspect he got all that out in person ;-), I found this "friend" by the name of Edwina Gregorio! No, I don't think he's f**king her, but the emotional intimacy can cut just as deep. Many jokes made by her about her being too "old" for him... Been there, done that! (I know I've made allusions to the fact that She Who Shall Not Be Named is 10 yrs older than Ex, that makes her 14 yrs older than me... I've actually made that into my mantra of sorts: when I'm teetering on the knife-edge of making an unhealthy choice, I repeat to myself "14 yrs, 14 yrs" ! Cruel but effective)
Well I Googled this rival & got nowhere - I'm just not that skilled of a computer nerd. Got the bright idea that they might be FB friends, but no luck. Like it or not, I'm just going to have to ASK HUBBY. I ask for your support, dear SparkFriends, bcz this might just be the beginning of the end for Marriage #2. I may not beat those 70% failure statistics...
So Close & Yet So Far
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
No news to report on the personal front, SparkFriends, as I continue to watch & wait before doing anything drastic... I did glance at Hubby's phone @ 5:15 AM since I wasn't sleeping - no new messages from EG. Perhaps it's running its course, or perhaps Hubby is just as neglectful of the social niceties w/his friends as he is w/his wife ?!?!? At least it doesn't seem to be a red-hot thriller as when Ex was sneaking around w/She Who Shall Not Be Named - "way back when" (16 yrs ago before texting became the norm), I kept on seeing these "469" messages on M's pager (remember those ancient devices?).
I'll let you think about it a while, then contemplate the keypad of a touch-tone phone... "469" = "I.L.Y."
I felt really stupid that it took me months & months to figure that out - of course, Ex was assuring me that it was some sort of top-secret code from WORK.
Anyway, now we have raced almost completely through the month of October; once more I'm going to be at least 2 hrs short in my fitness minutes (too much slacking off this month) As I maneuver stiffly from my office chair, to exam room, to surgery & pharmacy "making the circuit" - gym work is not for sissies! We had a couple of cancellations which equaled an opportunity to catch up on last week's missed PT session. Bill mixed it up for me today, heavy on the leg work & ending w/a 9-min HIIT session on the elliptical... (Started to type "short" but although it only took 9 min, believe me it was PLENTY long!) Sweat was pouring from me, HR rocketing into the 150's!
I can feel my lower back stiffening up since the first exercise Bill put me through (using several variations) was called a "good-morning"... I had stumbled across this dude's website - the name, "Body For Wife", tickled me, as did his motto: "I won’t blow sunshine up your a$$ or promise a quick and easy miracle cure for getting in shape."
www.bodyforwife.com/
I printed out a couple of his amusing articles for Z (I esp enjoyed the paintball one); look under "Stupid Stories" for more. Anyway, at one point I clicked onto James' serious fitness articles, & discovered his 3-part Total Fitness routine: 21 different exercises which you rotate through to work the whole carcass. I wrote them out on index cards to make them easier to keep track of, but the only one I didn't recognize was this "good-morning"? A photo showed a Sweet Young Thang bending forward from the waist w/a bar across her shoulders... Bill set me up likewise & told me to bow w/straight legs. After a few reps, I felt it in glutes & hamstrings, but the bar was pressing painfully on the base of my neck & my traps. I adjusted it around T2, narrowed my grip, & carried on. I found it more comfortable to do variations using a resistance band or working off Bill's cable & pulley multidirectional torture device, but bottom line is I did far too many reps of a unfamiliar exercise during this first round.
And yet I still owe the treadmill 2 mi... Back to Square 1 on half-marathon training, but so far my feets feel OK. I'll soak these old bones tonight.
No news to report on the personal front, SparkFriends, as I continue to watch & wait before doing anything drastic... I did glance at Hubby's phone @ 5:15 AM since I wasn't sleeping - no new messages from EG. Perhaps it's running its course, or perhaps Hubby is just as neglectful of the social niceties w/his friends as he is w/his wife ?!?!? At least it doesn't seem to be a red-hot thriller as when Ex was sneaking around w/She Who Shall Not Be Named - "way back when" (16 yrs ago before texting became the norm), I kept on seeing these "469" messages on M's pager (remember those ancient devices?).
I'll let you think about it a while, then contemplate the keypad of a touch-tone phone... "469" = "I.L.Y."
I felt really stupid that it took me months & months to figure that out - of course, Ex was assuring me that it was some sort of top-secret code from WORK.
Anyway, now we have raced almost completely through the month of October; once more I'm going to be at least 2 hrs short in my fitness minutes (too much slacking off this month) As I maneuver stiffly from my office chair, to exam room, to surgery & pharmacy "making the circuit" - gym work is not for sissies! We had a couple of cancellations which equaled an opportunity to catch up on last week's missed PT session. Bill mixed it up for me today, heavy on the leg work & ending w/a 9-min HIIT session on the elliptical... (Started to type "short" but although it only took 9 min, believe me it was PLENTY long!) Sweat was pouring from me, HR rocketing into the 150's!
I can feel my lower back stiffening up since the first exercise Bill put me through (using several variations) was called a "good-morning"... I had stumbled across this dude's website - the name, "Body For Wife", tickled me, as did his motto: "I won’t blow sunshine up your a$$ or promise a quick and easy miracle cure for getting in shape."
www.bodyforwife.com/
I printed out a couple of his amusing articles for Z (I esp enjoyed the paintball one); look under "Stupid Stories" for more. Anyway, at one point I clicked onto James' serious fitness articles, & discovered his 3-part Total Fitness routine: 21 different exercises which you rotate through to work the whole carcass. I wrote them out on index cards to make them easier to keep track of, but the only one I didn't recognize was this "good-morning"? A photo showed a Sweet Young Thang bending forward from the waist w/a bar across her shoulders... Bill set me up likewise & told me to bow w/straight legs. After a few reps, I felt it in glutes & hamstrings, but the bar was pressing painfully on the base of my neck & my traps. I adjusted it around T2, narrowed my grip, & carried on. I found it more comfortable to do variations using a resistance band or working off Bill's cable & pulley multidirectional torture device, but bottom line is I did far too many reps of a unfamiliar exercise during this first round.
And yet I still owe the treadmill 2 mi... Back to Square 1 on half-marathon training, but so far my feets feel OK. I'll soak these old bones tonight.
I'll let you think about it a while, then contemplate the keypad of a touch-tone phone... "469" = "I.L.Y."
I felt really stupid that it took me months & months to figure that out - of course, Ex was assuring me that it was some sort of top-secret code from WORK.
Anyway, now we have raced almost completely through the month of October; once more I'm going to be at least 2 hrs short in my fitness minutes (too much slacking off this month) As I maneuver stiffly from my office chair, to exam room, to surgery & pharmacy "making the circuit" - gym work is not for sissies! We had a couple of cancellations which equaled an opportunity to catch up on last week's missed PT session. Bill mixed it up for me today, heavy on the leg work & ending w/a 9-min HIIT session on the elliptical... (Started to type "short" but although it only took 9 min, believe me it was PLENTY long!) Sweat was pouring from me, HR rocketing into the 150's!
I can feel my lower back stiffening up since the first exercise Bill put me through (using several variations) was called a "good-morning"... I had stumbled across this dude's website - the name, "Body For Wife", tickled me, as did his motto: "I won’t blow sunshine up your a$$ or promise a quick and easy miracle cure for getting in shape."
www.bodyforwife.com/
I printed out a couple of his amusing articles for Z (I esp enjoyed the paintball one); look under "Stupid Stories" for more. Anyway, at one point I clicked onto James' serious fitness articles, & discovered his 3-part Total Fitness routine: 21 different exercises which you rotate through to work the whole carcass. I wrote them out on index cards to make them easier to keep track of, but the only one I didn't recognize was this "good-morning"? A photo showed a Sweet Young Thang bending forward from the waist w/a bar across her shoulders... Bill set me up likewise & told me to bow w/straight legs. After a few reps, I felt it in glutes & hamstrings, but the bar was pressing painfully on the base of my neck & my traps. I adjusted it around T2, narrowed my grip, & carried on. I found it more comfortable to do variations using a resistance band or working off Bill's cable & pulley multidirectional torture device, but bottom line is I did far too many reps of a unfamiliar exercise during this first round.
And yet I still owe the treadmill 2 mi... Back to Square 1 on half-marathon training, but so far my feets feel OK. I'll soak these old bones tonight.
Never Enough...
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Well SparkFriends, I started a post yesterday, sh!t hit the fan and I lost it when SP timed me "out" of my session... What does that take - 6 or 8 hrs???
Anyway, it was just as well - I'm a miserable mess - chronic pain in L shoulder has flared up, so my universe shrinks to that reality! I've seen the chiropractor a couple of times - last week & this week - he's gotten it "moving" a little bit, which gives temporary relief but then rebounds w/more spasms of pain.
I have already set aside my half-marathon training program since my L outer metatarsal has been sore... It's getting better, hopefully only a minor strain or sprain but another discouraging fact. I am continually ashamed of unflattering candid photos of myself; you would think I would be well aware of what I look like by now?!? (see next paragraph)
I managed to get away for my last ride of this season in the FL Panhandle, a very pleasant mini-vacation w/my friend Lucy... I had my heart set on 2 more 50's, but my back locked up @ 24 mi on Friday, I had to disqualify myself (my horse was absolutely FINE). We set out again on Sat, slowed down a bit, & got our 50 mi done in about 7:45. Lucy was attempting a 100-mi event, but had to pull at 70-some-odd mi w/tired pony...
And of course, my ex is already stirring the pot - insisting on picking up son this Fri for "HIS" week of Thanksgiving break - I'm sorry (for Z's sake), but I must protest! Fair is fair, and that would give me only a single weekend for the month of Nov - I'm going to insist on "MY" 4th weekend, if necessary I'll hand Z over Sun night but M already has had extended weekends on 2 occasions over these past 3 wks - when Z was out of school on 10/25 & last Mon 11/18...
(Z has already been talking about plans he wants to make w/friends this weekend so I know damn well he wants to stay AT HOME!)
Well SparkFriends, I started a post yesterday, sh!t hit the fan and I lost it when SP timed me "out" of my session... What does that take - 6 or 8 hrs???
Anyway, it was just as well - I'm a miserable mess - chronic pain in L shoulder has flared up, so my universe shrinks to that reality! I've seen the chiropractor a couple of times - last week & this week - he's gotten it "moving" a little bit, which gives temporary relief but then rebounds w/more spasms of pain.
I have already set aside my half-marathon training program since my L outer metatarsal has been sore... It's getting better, hopefully only a minor strain or sprain but another discouraging fact. I am continually ashamed of unflattering candid photos of myself; you would think I would be well aware of what I look like by now?!? (see next paragraph)
I managed to get away for my last ride of this season in the FL Panhandle, a very pleasant mini-vacation w/my friend Lucy... I had my heart set on 2 more 50's, but my back locked up @ 24 mi on Friday, I had to disqualify myself (my horse was absolutely FINE). We set out again on Sat, slowed down a bit, & got our 50 mi done in about 7:45. Lucy was attempting a 100-mi event, but had to pull at 70-some-odd mi w/tired pony...
And of course, my ex is already stirring the pot - insisting on picking up son this Fri for "HIS" week of Thanksgiving break - I'm sorry (for Z's sake), but I must protest! Fair is fair, and that would give me only a single weekend for the month of Nov - I'm going to insist on "MY" 4th weekend, if necessary I'll hand Z over Sun night but M already has had extended weekends on 2 occasions over these past 3 wks - when Z was out of school on 10/25 & last Mon 11/18...
(Z has already been talking about plans he wants to make w/friends this weekend so I know damn well he wants to stay AT HOME!)
Anyway, it was just as well - I'm a miserable mess - chronic pain in L shoulder has flared up, so my universe shrinks to that reality! I've seen the chiropractor a couple of times - last week & this week - he's gotten it "moving" a little bit, which gives temporary relief but then rebounds w/more spasms of pain.
I have already set aside my half-marathon training program since my L outer metatarsal has been sore... It's getting better, hopefully only a minor strain or sprain but another discouraging fact. I am continually ashamed of unflattering candid photos of myself; you would think I would be well aware of what I look like by now?!? (see next paragraph)
I managed to get away for my last ride of this season in the FL Panhandle, a very pleasant mini-vacation w/my friend Lucy... I had my heart set on 2 more 50's, but my back locked up @ 24 mi on Friday, I had to disqualify myself (my horse was absolutely FINE). We set out again on Sat, slowed down a bit, & got our 50 mi done in about 7:45. Lucy was attempting a 100-mi event, but had to pull at 70-some-odd mi w/tired pony...
And of course, my ex is already stirring the pot - insisting on picking up son this Fri for "HIS" week of Thanksgiving break - I'm sorry (for Z's sake), but I must protest! Fair is fair, and that would give me only a single weekend for the month of Nov - I'm going to insist on "MY" 4th weekend, if necessary I'll hand Z over Sun night but M already has had extended weekends on 2 occasions over these past 3 wks - when Z was out of school on 10/25 & last Mon 11/18...
(Z has already been talking about plans he wants to make w/friends this weekend so I know damn well he wants to stay AT HOME!)
Typing May Not Make it So
Friday, November 22, 2013
...but it is certainly therapeutic! I don't want to go back thru my blog entries & count up how many times I've listed "restart", "try, try again", "hitting rock bottom", or similar sentiments...
For example: weight is slowing creeping back down from my latest stress-induced bloating up (don't we all know how easily it piles on, how slow & painful it is to peel off!?!?!) - this AM I felt somewhat "thin" so I risked a glance at my cruel home scales which showed me UP 2 lbs from my last weigh-in! Yes, I'm probably the only person on this earth who can haul off & ride 74 mi over 2 d, back to sense & sensibility on the diet front (I'm even more righteous than usual when traveling w/friend Lucy, the vegetarian!), yet I am rewarded w/a net GAIN!?!?!?
Yes, there has been much stress (I'll get into that later), chronic ongoing pain from L shoulder, sleep deprivation, but C'MON MAN!!! Hormones should be at a low ebb; can't I get a little slack here? How many times do I have to be smacked in the face w/the evidence that the theory of "CICO" is sorely deficient - it truly IS all about the biochemistry, stupid!
I watch my friends here as well as IRL struggle, consumed w/righteous anger on all our behalf's (sic)... Flitting around aimlessly today in the low ebb of another completely expected volley from Ex. (He is within his legal rights to appropriate "my" 4th weekend this year since Z's school is in recess for the entire week of Thanksgiving; that doesn't make it the "right" thing to do ethically. Z, however, has said he doesn't want me to argue about it which I understand, since HE has to live w/the man next week! Just a couple more small segments of my son's childhood peeled away; the wound should barely bleed at this point.)
But I went home yesterday morning after delivering Z to school & simply went back to bed; my energy completely drained away.
Hubby laid an affectionate hand on my back this AM which was a complete surprise: unexpected, out of character, and not able to reciprocate since I had my hands full of stuff, trying to get out the door! It feels like the story of my life.
...but it is certainly therapeutic! I don't want to go back thru my blog entries & count up how many times I've listed "restart", "try, try again", "hitting rock bottom", or similar sentiments...
For example: weight is slowing creeping back down from my latest stress-induced bloating up (don't we all know how easily it piles on, how slow & painful it is to peel off!?!?!) - this AM I felt somewhat "thin" so I risked a glance at my cruel home scales which showed me UP 2 lbs from my last weigh-in! Yes, I'm probably the only person on this earth who can haul off & ride 74 mi over 2 d, back to sense & sensibility on the diet front (I'm even more righteous than usual when traveling w/friend Lucy, the vegetarian!), yet I am rewarded w/a net GAIN!?!?!?
Yes, there has been much stress (I'll get into that later), chronic ongoing pain from L shoulder, sleep deprivation, but C'MON MAN!!! Hormones should be at a low ebb; can't I get a little slack here? How many times do I have to be smacked in the face w/the evidence that the theory of "CICO" is sorely deficient - it truly IS all about the biochemistry, stupid!
I watch my friends here as well as IRL struggle, consumed w/righteous anger on all our behalf's (sic)... Flitting around aimlessly today in the low ebb of another completely expected volley from Ex. (He is within his legal rights to appropriate "my" 4th weekend this year since Z's school is in recess for the entire week of Thanksgiving; that doesn't make it the "right" thing to do ethically. Z, however, has said he doesn't want me to argue about it which I understand, since HE has to live w/the man next week! Just a couple more small segments of my son's childhood peeled away; the wound should barely bleed at this point.)
But I went home yesterday morning after delivering Z to school & simply went back to bed; my energy completely drained away.
Hubby laid an affectionate hand on my back this AM which was a complete surprise: unexpected, out of character, and not able to reciprocate since I had my hands full of stuff, trying to get out the door! It feels like the story of my life.
For example: weight is slowing creeping back down from my latest stress-induced bloating up (don't we all know how easily it piles on, how slow & painful it is to peel off!?!?!) - this AM I felt somewhat "thin" so I risked a glance at my cruel home scales which showed me UP 2 lbs from my last weigh-in! Yes, I'm probably the only person on this earth who can haul off & ride 74 mi over 2 d, back to sense & sensibility on the diet front (I'm even more righteous than usual when traveling w/friend Lucy, the vegetarian!), yet I am rewarded w/a net GAIN!?!?!?
Yes, there has been much stress (I'll get into that later), chronic ongoing pain from L shoulder, sleep deprivation, but C'MON MAN!!! Hormones should be at a low ebb; can't I get a little slack here? How many times do I have to be smacked in the face w/the evidence that the theory of "CICO" is sorely deficient - it truly IS all about the biochemistry, stupid!
I watch my friends here as well as IRL struggle, consumed w/righteous anger on all our behalf's (sic)... Flitting around aimlessly today in the low ebb of another completely expected volley from Ex. (He is within his legal rights to appropriate "my" 4th weekend this year since Z's school is in recess for the entire week of Thanksgiving; that doesn't make it the "right" thing to do ethically. Z, however, has said he doesn't want me to argue about it which I understand, since HE has to live w/the man next week! Just a couple more small segments of my son's childhood peeled away; the wound should barely bleed at this point.)
But I went home yesterday morning after delivering Z to school & simply went back to bed; my energy completely drained away.
Hubby laid an affectionate hand on my back this AM which was a complete surprise: unexpected, out of character, and not able to reciprocate since I had my hands full of stuff, trying to get out the door! It feels like the story of my life.
Two Dates
Monday, December 02, 2013
...One w/Hubby; the second w/myself!!!
Both moderately successful; I was pleasantly surprised that Hubby "came through in a pinch", booking us into a nice hotel Fri night in Shreveport (The Remington; 5 stars from Val!) so we could lose a few bucks in the casinos, enjoy a fancy dinner, and basically practice enjoying one another's company again...
I thought the 3-hr car trip would be an inescapable opportunity for heart-to-heart conversation, but P seemed mystified when I tried to pry open that door -
"I'd rather hear about something direct from you instead of from a 3rd party."
Instead of revealing any personal information, he obediently started relating what he knew of Baby Brother & his ex-wife's latest legal battle...That wasn't where I'd intended to go, but when I thanked him kindly for this family news & told him I actually was referring to HIMSELF, conversation between us once again fizzled out... I could have come clean & admitted to snooping on his phone, but let's face it - I was cowardly & didn't want to spoil our chances at a pleasant weekend together. Don't ask don't tell indeed!
It was encouraging that we can still feel passion for one another, even the day after Thanksgiving overindulgence ;-) !!! Don't think we'd been in our cozy hotel room 15 min before we were trying out that bed, feeling very decadent in that mound of fluffy white pillows... (There's something about a hotel room that seems to get P's blood flowing - maybe it's a whiff of licentiousness?!?)
Initially I'd been disappointed that P only booked us in for a single night, but considering that there were no non-smoking casinos**, nor had I brought my shopping list, it was just as well that we headed back home on Sat. We did visit a chiropractor who popped my misplaced 5th rib back in place - hopefully a large reason behind my recent misery w/L shoulder.
**Still coughing a bit; doesn't take very much secondhand cigarette smoke exposure to have ill effects on me! Got up Sat morning extremely congested w/mild laryngitis.
So my Sun "date w/myself" involved getting my tail BACK into the hot yoga studio (I hadn't found the time to fit in a class in almost 5 mos), then going by the Korean sauna for a little more sweat n' soak... Master Dan admitted he had heard some complaints, so he has tuned back his intensity slightly - while it was difficult, the yoga class was not too terrible an ordeal. I'm pleasantly sore today - mostly hamstrings & lower back. Once again I failed to make my 800-min monthly goal; if I come up short again in the month of Dec, I think I'll scale it back to 600 min - an average of 20 min/day should be achievable!
...One w/Hubby; the second w/myself!!!
Both moderately successful; I was pleasantly surprised that Hubby "came through in a pinch", booking us into a nice hotel Fri night in Shreveport (The Remington; 5 stars from Val!) so we could lose a few bucks in the casinos, enjoy a fancy dinner, and basically practice enjoying one another's company again...
I thought the 3-hr car trip would be an inescapable opportunity for heart-to-heart conversation, but P seemed mystified when I tried to pry open that door -
"I'd rather hear about something direct from you instead of from a 3rd party."
Instead of revealing any personal information, he obediently started relating what he knew of Baby Brother & his ex-wife's latest legal battle...That wasn't where I'd intended to go, but when I thanked him kindly for this family news & told him I actually was referring to HIMSELF, conversation between us once again fizzled out... I could have come clean & admitted to snooping on his phone, but let's face it - I was cowardly & didn't want to spoil our chances at a pleasant weekend together. Don't ask don't tell indeed!
It was encouraging that we can still feel passion for one another, even the day after Thanksgiving overindulgence ;-) !!! Don't think we'd been in our cozy hotel room 15 min before we were trying out that bed, feeling very decadent in that mound of fluffy white pillows... (There's something about a hotel room that seems to get P's blood flowing - maybe it's a whiff of licentiousness?!?)
Initially I'd been disappointed that P only booked us in for a single night, but considering that there were no non-smoking casinos**, nor had I brought my shopping list, it was just as well that we headed back home on Sat. We did visit a chiropractor who popped my misplaced 5th rib back in place - hopefully a large reason behind my recent misery w/L shoulder.
**Still coughing a bit; doesn't take very much secondhand cigarette smoke exposure to have ill effects on me! Got up Sat morning extremely congested w/mild laryngitis.
So my Sun "date w/myself" involved getting my tail BACK into the hot yoga studio (I hadn't found the time to fit in a class in almost 5 mos), then going by the Korean sauna for a little more sweat n' soak... Master Dan admitted he had heard some complaints, so he has tuned back his intensity slightly - while it was difficult, the yoga class was not too terrible an ordeal. I'm pleasantly sore today - mostly hamstrings & lower back. Once again I failed to make my 800-min monthly goal; if I come up short again in the month of Dec, I think I'll scale it back to 600 min - an average of 20 min/day should be achievable!
Both moderately successful; I was pleasantly surprised that Hubby "came through in a pinch", booking us into a nice hotel Fri night in Shreveport (The Remington; 5 stars from Val!) so we could lose a few bucks in the casinos, enjoy a fancy dinner, and basically practice enjoying one another's company again...
I thought the 3-hr car trip would be an inescapable opportunity for heart-to-heart conversation, but P seemed mystified when I tried to pry open that door -
"I'd rather hear about something direct from you instead of from a 3rd party."
Instead of revealing any personal information, he obediently started relating what he knew of Baby Brother & his ex-wife's latest legal battle...That wasn't where I'd intended to go, but when I thanked him kindly for this family news & told him I actually was referring to HIMSELF, conversation between us once again fizzled out... I could have come clean & admitted to snooping on his phone, but let's face it - I was cowardly & didn't want to spoil our chances at a pleasant weekend together. Don't ask don't tell indeed!
It was encouraging that we can still feel passion for one another, even the day after Thanksgiving overindulgence ;-) !!! Don't think we'd been in our cozy hotel room 15 min before we were trying out that bed, feeling very decadent in that mound of fluffy white pillows... (There's something about a hotel room that seems to get P's blood flowing - maybe it's a whiff of licentiousness?!?)
Initially I'd been disappointed that P only booked us in for a single night, but considering that there were no non-smoking casinos**, nor had I brought my shopping list, it was just as well that we headed back home on Sat. We did visit a chiropractor who popped my misplaced 5th rib back in place - hopefully a large reason behind my recent misery w/L shoulder.
**Still coughing a bit; doesn't take very much secondhand cigarette smoke exposure to have ill effects on me! Got up Sat morning extremely congested w/mild laryngitis.
So my Sun "date w/myself" involved getting my tail BACK into the hot yoga studio (I hadn't found the time to fit in a class in almost 5 mos), then going by the Korean sauna for a little more sweat n' soak... Master Dan admitted he had heard some complaints, so he has tuned back his intensity slightly - while it was difficult, the yoga class was not too terrible an ordeal. I'm pleasantly sore today - mostly hamstrings & lower back. Once again I failed to make my 800-min monthly goal; if I come up short again in the month of Dec, I think I'll scale it back to 600 min - an average of 20 min/day should be achievable!
A Slow Start
Friday, December 13, 2013
My Thanksgiving holiday was a rushed affair; I only had minimal amounts of time to visit w/All My Cousins (the closest relatives I've got to siblings)...
I had hoped to make a triumphant entrance, turning everyone's head w/The New Me, but it was more Same Ol', Same Ol'...However, I never escape from my role of impromptu family "physician" ;-) - veterinarians are CONSTANTLY being solicited for medical advice, even though I made it my public policy to exclude primates from my practice YEARS ago! (Remind me to tell you the story of the macaque who destroyed the back room of my "new, used" clinic shortly after we opened up!).
Anyway, my cousin's oldest daughter had just been released from the hospital w/a working diagnosis of "diverticulitis" even though the symptomatic puzzle was far from complete; I did get in a plug for gluten hypersensitivity and mentioned my own minor dietary travails. (Although in my family, as may be true for most, my theories won't gain any legitimacy until I lose more weight)
I myself have been experimenting w/resistant starch as outlined on this dude's blog:
selfhacked.com/2013/06/1
5/the-resistant-starch-die
t-the-most-effective-diet-
for-weight-loss/
It's been a slow start; in the 1st 3 days I yo-yo'd between miserable constipation and let's just say, the opposite! As last summer when I did intermittent fasting, I know a large part of my problem was insufficient water intake. So far I'm still waiting for the improved sleep, vivid dreams, feelings of vitality & better energy levels. Since I'm not adopting his rice-and-lentils low-reward type diet exclusively, I'll give this experiment a little more time to "ferment"... This morning I was pleasantly surprised to see the scales move down a pound. (My blog post would otherwise have been titled: "0.2 lbs in 3 Days")
My Thanksgiving holiday was a rushed affair; I only had minimal amounts of time to visit w/All My Cousins (the closest relatives I've got to siblings)...
I had hoped to make a triumphant entrance, turning everyone's head w/The New Me, but it was more Same Ol', Same Ol'...However, I never escape from my role of impromptu family "physician" ;-) - veterinarians are CONSTANTLY being solicited for medical advice, even though I made it my public policy to exclude primates from my practice YEARS ago! (Remind me to tell you the story of the macaque who destroyed the back room of my "new, used" clinic shortly after we opened up!).
Anyway, my cousin's oldest daughter had just been released from the hospital w/a working diagnosis of "diverticulitis" even though the symptomatic puzzle was far from complete; I did get in a plug for gluten hypersensitivity and mentioned my own minor dietary travails. (Although in my family, as may be true for most, my theories won't gain any legitimacy until I lose more weight)
I myself have been experimenting w/resistant starch as outlined on this dude's blog:
selfhacked.com/2013/06/1
5/the-resistant-starch-die
t-the-most-effective-diet-
for-weight-loss/
It's been a slow start; in the 1st 3 days I yo-yo'd between miserable constipation and let's just say, the opposite! As last summer when I did intermittent fasting, I know a large part of my problem was insufficient water intake. So far I'm still waiting for the improved sleep, vivid dreams, feelings of vitality & better energy levels. Since I'm not adopting his rice-and-lentils low-reward type diet exclusively, I'll give this experiment a little more time to "ferment"... This morning I was pleasantly surprised to see the scales move down a pound. (My blog post would otherwise have been titled: "0.2 lbs in 3 Days")
I had hoped to make a triumphant entrance, turning everyone's head w/The New Me, but it was more Same Ol', Same Ol'...However, I never escape from my role of impromptu family "physician" ;-) - veterinarians are CONSTANTLY being solicited for medical advice, even though I made it my public policy to exclude primates from my practice YEARS ago! (Remind me to tell you the story of the macaque who destroyed the back room of my "new, used" clinic shortly after we opened up!).
Anyway, my cousin's oldest daughter had just been released from the hospital w/a working diagnosis of "diverticulitis" even though the symptomatic puzzle was far from complete; I did get in a plug for gluten hypersensitivity and mentioned my own minor dietary travails. (Although in my family, as may be true for most, my theories won't gain any legitimacy until I lose more weight)
I myself have been experimenting w/resistant starch as outlined on this dude's blog:
selfhacked.com/2013/06/1
5/the-resistant-starch-die
t-the-most-effective-diet-
for-weight-loss/
It's been a slow start; in the 1st 3 days I yo-yo'd between miserable constipation and let's just say, the opposite! As last summer when I did intermittent fasting, I know a large part of my problem was insufficient water intake. So far I'm still waiting for the improved sleep, vivid dreams, feelings of vitality & better energy levels. Since I'm not adopting his rice-and-lentils low-reward type diet exclusively, I'll give this experiment a little more time to "ferment"... This morning I was pleasantly surprised to see the scales move down a pound. (My blog post would otherwise have been titled: "0.2 lbs in 3 Days")
Late to the Party??
Saturday, December 14, 2013
Ha ha! Well last night I was finally awarded w/a vivid dream sequence...nobody but nerdy ol' me...
It was a somewhat sinister "Six Million Dollar Man" episode, replayed for this rapt solo audience from several different perspectives... I woke up smiling - that cheesy show was my absolute fave as a kid! Someone cynical might want to blame the 2 glasses of vino I had last night (Italian dinner w/my girlfriends**), but I'm thanking that arrowroot starch!
**Moms went out to dinner while kids celebrated Phase 2 of Eric's BD by seeing the new "Hobbit" movie... While Hubs & I will likely see it also, I didn't want to buck crowds on opening weekend: serious fans in costume, etc.
This morning I have a hint of a headache (I rarely drink anymore), but I've tanked up on water & taken my Vit C - thankfully it's fading away. So I'll forge on w/my interesting lil' experiment - here's your intrepid self-reporter, signing out for now! (Busy weekend - gotta get Xmas decorations up, I'm finally in the mood - having my boy home after over a month!!!)
Ha ha! Well last night I was finally awarded w/a vivid dream sequence...nobody but nerdy ol' me...
It was a somewhat sinister "Six Million Dollar Man" episode, replayed for this rapt solo audience from several different perspectives... I woke up smiling - that cheesy show was my absolute fave as a kid! Someone cynical might want to blame the 2 glasses of vino I had last night (Italian dinner w/my girlfriends**), but I'm thanking that arrowroot starch!
**Moms went out to dinner while kids celebrated Phase 2 of Eric's BD by seeing the new "Hobbit" movie... While Hubs & I will likely see it also, I didn't want to buck crowds on opening weekend: serious fans in costume, etc.
This morning I have a hint of a headache (I rarely drink anymore), but I've tanked up on water & taken my Vit C - thankfully it's fading away. So I'll forge on w/my interesting lil' experiment - here's your intrepid self-reporter, signing out for now! (Busy weekend - gotta get Xmas decorations up, I'm finally in the mood - having my boy home after over a month!!!)
It was a somewhat sinister "Six Million Dollar Man" episode, replayed for this rapt solo audience from several different perspectives... I woke up smiling - that cheesy show was my absolute fave as a kid! Someone cynical might want to blame the 2 glasses of vino I had last night (Italian dinner w/my girlfriends**), but I'm thanking that arrowroot starch!
**Moms went out to dinner while kids celebrated Phase 2 of Eric's BD by seeing the new "Hobbit" movie... While Hubs & I will likely see it also, I didn't want to buck crowds on opening weekend: serious fans in costume, etc.
This morning I have a hint of a headache (I rarely drink anymore), but I've tanked up on water & taken my Vit C - thankfully it's fading away. So I'll forge on w/my interesting lil' experiment - here's your intrepid self-reporter, signing out for now! (Busy weekend - gotta get Xmas decorations up, I'm finally in the mood - having my boy home after over a month!!!)
5 Days of Xmas
Saturday, December 21, 2013
I was going to title this blog: "250 Miles Behind", aka "My Losing Season Cont" - since w/this season's pitiful showing - 200 mi - I fell at least 250 mi behind placing in our Heavyweight standings...
I tried to search previous years' mileage for comparison's sake, but was denied access to AERC site since I had been late renewing my 2014 membership...I renewed our family membership online (marking P's membership "non-rider" since I don't foresee him entering another LD event - I count that $20 as a donation to my sport) yet I STILL couldn't log on - obviously spoiled by this era's instant gratification. Imagine that - in this day & age, AERC still has a real live human authorize memberships, so there's a Real Life time-lag! Fortunately, there's always my backlog of old Endurance News magazines to fall back on - but my scalp prickled as I scanned the 2011 year-end issue; both She Who Shall Not Be Named & myself ended up with the EXACT SAME mileage: 355. (This was not simply a coincidence of attending all the same events either - although I am unlucky enough to have to share horse camp w/her at most of our TX events, there are those each of us attend on our own. For me, it's NM - and for SWSNBN, it's OK or MO.)
Looking back over previous seasons is a good exercise in humility, I suppose, if nothing else - reminding me of the triumphs as well as the failures. I had such high hopes for my Quig-monster, who now stands idle in the pasture - sidelined by navicular disease in his prime, just shy of his 2000-mi mark. And plans for my Babygirl Sahara (Quig's 4-yrs-older half-sister) had to be shelved at the onset of her career, when a hock radiograph revealed crippling spavin in my sweet angel at only 5 yrs of age. She still managed to give me almost 1000 mi (610 endurance/360 limited distance) of "unbridled joy" (yeah, she wore a bridle, just not a bit), and of course gifted me with the (potentially awesome) fruit of her womb Moonshine... I've been so spooked by my bad luck (let's not start the roll call, shall we? But I don't want to disrespect my angels by forgetting about or failing to learn from my darling Buck, Shetan, Shawna, Charlie, Zacc-the-horse, or Ahab) that I've hardly done anything w/Moonie - but he'll be 7 this year & I really need to see if his future lies in endurance or instead as Champ's successor (the "husband horse", a very cushy position - just ask Champ!) Even so, Champ has done 3 50's (one of which being my son's First Fifty), and has racked up a quite respectable 485 LD miles. He's the horse I feel comfortable putting any novice on, knowing he'll take care of 'em.
I didn't really intend for this to turn into a retrospective, but that's apparently what happens when I am interrupted numberless times... My scattered thoughts invariably circle back to those beings which are (mostly) under my control. This will not be a "Lucky 13" kind of year for me - not only w/all my failures in the endurance arena, but a demoralizing loss in my legal challenge... It really doesn't help much when fellow custody-war survivors chime in w/their stories (aka Judge G has clearly identified himself as a misogynist a$$hole in prior rulings, and now just to a lesser extent in mine & Z's). Z went off on a diatribe against his father the other night, and all I could do was bear witness. The behavior Z observes is a true indicator of M's nature - I've been the victim of it myself, so I won't insult Z's intelligence by discounting his analysis. All I can do is advise him of the facts: that he should NOT resort to physical resistance or retaliation, the only solution will be AVOIDANCE. And hopefully that will be a viable option soon - in 6 mos Z will be able to get his driver's license; I have unofficial advice that if Z refuses to drive himself over to his father's, at least there will be no legal repercussions against ME.
Now I had best publish this ragged summation, since I have but 5 more short days w/my son (M will get the lion's share of Xmas break this year) & I intend to make the absolute most of it! (He's still sleeping in but Mom needs to make breakfast.)
I was going to title this blog: "250 Miles Behind", aka "My Losing Season Cont" - since w/this season's pitiful showing - 200 mi - I fell at least 250 mi behind placing in our Heavyweight standings...
I tried to search previous years' mileage for comparison's sake, but was denied access to AERC site since I had been late renewing my 2014 membership...I renewed our family membership online (marking P's membership "non-rider" since I don't foresee him entering another LD event - I count that $20 as a donation to my sport) yet I STILL couldn't log on - obviously spoiled by this era's instant gratification. Imagine that - in this day & age, AERC still has a real live human authorize memberships, so there's a Real Life time-lag! Fortunately, there's always my backlog of old Endurance News magazines to fall back on - but my scalp prickled as I scanned the 2011 year-end issue; both She Who Shall Not Be Named & myself ended up with the EXACT SAME mileage: 355. (This was not simply a coincidence of attending all the same events either - although I am unlucky enough to have to share horse camp w/her at most of our TX events, there are those each of us attend on our own. For me, it's NM - and for SWSNBN, it's OK or MO.)
Looking back over previous seasons is a good exercise in humility, I suppose, if nothing else - reminding me of the triumphs as well as the failures. I had such high hopes for my Quig-monster, who now stands idle in the pasture - sidelined by navicular disease in his prime, just shy of his 2000-mi mark. And plans for my Babygirl Sahara (Quig's 4-yrs-older half-sister) had to be shelved at the onset of her career, when a hock radiograph revealed crippling spavin in my sweet angel at only 5 yrs of age. She still managed to give me almost 1000 mi (610 endurance/360 limited distance) of "unbridled joy" (yeah, she wore a bridle, just not a bit), and of course gifted me with the (potentially awesome) fruit of her womb Moonshine... I've been so spooked by my bad luck (let's not start the roll call, shall we? But I don't want to disrespect my angels by forgetting about or failing to learn from my darling Buck, Shetan, Shawna, Charlie, Zacc-the-horse, or Ahab) that I've hardly done anything w/Moonie - but he'll be 7 this year & I really need to see if his future lies in endurance or instead as Champ's successor (the "husband horse", a very cushy position - just ask Champ!) Even so, Champ has done 3 50's (one of which being my son's First Fifty), and has racked up a quite respectable 485 LD miles. He's the horse I feel comfortable putting any novice on, knowing he'll take care of 'em.
I didn't really intend for this to turn into a retrospective, but that's apparently what happens when I am interrupted numberless times... My scattered thoughts invariably circle back to those beings which are (mostly) under my control. This will not be a "Lucky 13" kind of year for me - not only w/all my failures in the endurance arena, but a demoralizing loss in my legal challenge... It really doesn't help much when fellow custody-war survivors chime in w/their stories (aka Judge G has clearly identified himself as a misogynist a$$hole in prior rulings, and now just to a lesser extent in mine & Z's). Z went off on a diatribe against his father the other night, and all I could do was bear witness. The behavior Z observes is a true indicator of M's nature - I've been the victim of it myself, so I won't insult Z's intelligence by discounting his analysis. All I can do is advise him of the facts: that he should NOT resort to physical resistance or retaliation, the only solution will be AVOIDANCE. And hopefully that will be a viable option soon - in 6 mos Z will be able to get his driver's license; I have unofficial advice that if Z refuses to drive himself over to his father's, at least there will be no legal repercussions against ME.
Now I had best publish this ragged summation, since I have but 5 more short days w/my son (M will get the lion's share of Xmas break this year) & I intend to make the absolute most of it! (He's still sleeping in but Mom needs to make breakfast.)
I tried to search previous years' mileage for comparison's sake, but was denied access to AERC site since I had been late renewing my 2014 membership...I renewed our family membership online (marking P's membership "non-rider" since I don't foresee him entering another LD event - I count that $20 as a donation to my sport) yet I STILL couldn't log on - obviously spoiled by this era's instant gratification. Imagine that - in this day & age, AERC still has a real live human authorize memberships, so there's a Real Life time-lag! Fortunately, there's always my backlog of old Endurance News magazines to fall back on - but my scalp prickled as I scanned the 2011 year-end issue; both She Who Shall Not Be Named & myself ended up with the EXACT SAME mileage: 355. (This was not simply a coincidence of attending all the same events either - although I am unlucky enough to have to share horse camp w/her at most of our TX events, there are those each of us attend on our own. For me, it's NM - and for SWSNBN, it's OK or MO.)
Looking back over previous seasons is a good exercise in humility, I suppose, if nothing else - reminding me of the triumphs as well as the failures. I had such high hopes for my Quig-monster, who now stands idle in the pasture - sidelined by navicular disease in his prime, just shy of his 2000-mi mark. And plans for my Babygirl Sahara (Quig's 4-yrs-older half-sister) had to be shelved at the onset of her career, when a hock radiograph revealed crippling spavin in my sweet angel at only 5 yrs of age. She still managed to give me almost 1000 mi (610 endurance/360 limited distance) of "unbridled joy" (yeah, she wore a bridle, just not a bit), and of course gifted me with the (potentially awesome) fruit of her womb Moonshine... I've been so spooked by my bad luck (let's not start the roll call, shall we? But I don't want to disrespect my angels by forgetting about or failing to learn from my darling Buck, Shetan, Shawna, Charlie, Zacc-the-horse, or Ahab) that I've hardly done anything w/Moonie - but he'll be 7 this year & I really need to see if his future lies in endurance or instead as Champ's successor (the "husband horse", a very cushy position - just ask Champ!) Even so, Champ has done 3 50's (one of which being my son's First Fifty), and has racked up a quite respectable 485 LD miles. He's the horse I feel comfortable putting any novice on, knowing he'll take care of 'em.
I didn't really intend for this to turn into a retrospective, but that's apparently what happens when I am interrupted numberless times... My scattered thoughts invariably circle back to those beings which are (mostly) under my control. This will not be a "Lucky 13" kind of year for me - not only w/all my failures in the endurance arena, but a demoralizing loss in my legal challenge... It really doesn't help much when fellow custody-war survivors chime in w/their stories (aka Judge G has clearly identified himself as a misogynist a$$hole in prior rulings, and now just to a lesser extent in mine & Z's). Z went off on a diatribe against his father the other night, and all I could do was bear witness. The behavior Z observes is a true indicator of M's nature - I've been the victim of it myself, so I won't insult Z's intelligence by discounting his analysis. All I can do is advise him of the facts: that he should NOT resort to physical resistance or retaliation, the only solution will be AVOIDANCE. And hopefully that will be a viable option soon - in 6 mos Z will be able to get his driver's license; I have unofficial advice that if Z refuses to drive himself over to his father's, at least there will be no legal repercussions against ME.
Now I had best publish this ragged summation, since I have but 5 more short days w/my son (M will get the lion's share of Xmas break this year) & I intend to make the absolute most of it! (He's still sleeping in but Mom needs to make breakfast.)
43 Min...
Thursday, January 02, 2014
...were all I lacked to make my 800-min monthly fitness goal for Dec; I count that as a true NSV since I've been coming up substantially short for several mos now, almost resetting it!
Also very excited to unwrap belated Xmas gift from hubby, a DDP Yoga DVD set! I have the 50+ "YRG" discs, but it was a toss-up between DDP & Shaun T's newest BeachBody workout T25... I'm all about getting mo' done in less time, but wasn't sure if I was up to an Insanity-level challenge?
But then a monkey wrench was hurled into household prep for MIL's visit (MAÑANA) when I noticed an email that went out yesterday, informing me that a vet school classmate's dad had passed away. (I knew he'd been ill, but Denise & I had fallen grievously out of touch)
Visitation was last night, funeral today so that was an easy choice: to hell w/housework, P never married me out of any confused resemblance to Martha Stewart! Got to move our stuff out of master BR, but then what it is is what it is... Need that big sign: "This household is maintained for the convenience & comfort of our animals"... I'm sure MIL will be quietly horrified but if she can't hack it, P can book her a room at nearby Holiday Inn! I did take our old man (almost-17-yr-old Dorian) up to clinic to board for w/e - while P seems to have accepted the fact that our ancient Rottie mix will spend his remaining time as a house dog, I didn't want him to have to help old crippled hound too much (that's mostly Mommy's job) or clean up his occasional "accident"... We got that hardwood down in master BR & DR just in time, since ruined carpet would have made MIL sick! The trade-off is that it's like an ice rink to Dorian, I'm trying to find comfortable traction booties for his weak hind legs. If he falls down, he can't get up, but that's good weight training for Mom (he's lost a lot of weight & only weighs about 55 now). However, we'll keep nursemaiding him as long as his appetite & attitude remain good - it's the LEAST we can do for him. He's been a Very Good Dog.
...were all I lacked to make my 800-min monthly fitness goal for Dec; I count that as a true NSV since I've been coming up substantially short for several mos now, almost resetting it!
Also very excited to unwrap belated Xmas gift from hubby, a DDP Yoga DVD set! I have the 50+ "YRG" discs, but it was a toss-up between DDP & Shaun T's newest BeachBody workout T25... I'm all about getting mo' done in less time, but wasn't sure if I was up to an Insanity-level challenge?
But then a monkey wrench was hurled into household prep for MIL's visit (MAÑANA) when I noticed an email that went out yesterday, informing me that a vet school classmate's dad had passed away. (I knew he'd been ill, but Denise & I had fallen grievously out of touch)
Visitation was last night, funeral today so that was an easy choice: to hell w/housework, P never married me out of any confused resemblance to Martha Stewart! Got to move our stuff out of master BR, but then what it is is what it is... Need that big sign: "This household is maintained for the convenience & comfort of our animals"... I'm sure MIL will be quietly horrified but if she can't hack it, P can book her a room at nearby Holiday Inn! I did take our old man (almost-17-yr-old Dorian) up to clinic to board for w/e - while P seems to have accepted the fact that our ancient Rottie mix will spend his remaining time as a house dog, I didn't want him to have to help old crippled hound too much (that's mostly Mommy's job) or clean up his occasional "accident"... We got that hardwood down in master BR & DR just in time, since ruined carpet would have made MIL sick! The trade-off is that it's like an ice rink to Dorian, I'm trying to find comfortable traction booties for his weak hind legs. If he falls down, he can't get up, but that's good weight training for Mom (he's lost a lot of weight & only weighs about 55 now). However, we'll keep nursemaiding him as long as his appetite & attitude remain good - it's the LEAST we can do for him. He's been a Very Good Dog.
Also very excited to unwrap belated Xmas gift from hubby, a DDP Yoga DVD set! I have the 50+ "YRG" discs, but it was a toss-up between DDP & Shaun T's newest BeachBody workout T25... I'm all about getting mo' done in less time, but wasn't sure if I was up to an Insanity-level challenge?
But then a monkey wrench was hurled into household prep for MIL's visit (MAÑANA) when I noticed an email that went out yesterday, informing me that a vet school classmate's dad had passed away. (I knew he'd been ill, but Denise & I had fallen grievously out of touch)
Visitation was last night, funeral today so that was an easy choice: to hell w/housework, P never married me out of any confused resemblance to Martha Stewart! Got to move our stuff out of master BR, but then what it is is what it is... Need that big sign: "This household is maintained for the convenience & comfort of our animals"... I'm sure MIL will be quietly horrified but if she can't hack it, P can book her a room at nearby Holiday Inn! I did take our old man (almost-17-yr-old Dorian) up to clinic to board for w/e - while P seems to have accepted the fact that our ancient Rottie mix will spend his remaining time as a house dog, I didn't want him to have to help old crippled hound too much (that's mostly Mommy's job) or clean up his occasional "accident"... We got that hardwood down in master BR & DR just in time, since ruined carpet would have made MIL sick! The trade-off is that it's like an ice rink to Dorian, I'm trying to find comfortable traction booties for his weak hind legs. If he falls down, he can't get up, but that's good weight training for Mom (he's lost a lot of weight & only weighs about 55 now). However, we'll keep nursemaiding him as long as his appetite & attitude remain good - it's the LEAST we can do for him. He's been a Very Good Dog.
Ride Your Own Ride
Monday, January 13, 2014
RYOR (Ride Your Own Ride) is an acronym we tell all new endurance riders... As gratifying as it is to be looked to for advice/suggestions/instruction
s "your mileage may vary" and you absolutely MUST pay close attention to the situation at hand, modify as needed, not stuff you & your horse into a "one-size-fits-all" template.
(3 more d of my MIL's visit - even though we've had a nice relaxed time, that old adage about fish n' houseguests is TRUE. Two wks is "two" much, but I am absolutely convinced of the rightness of my decision to give up our master BR downstairs, even though it's been awkward w/the 3 of us stuffed into upstairs BR's, utilizing 1 bathroom... She is even thinner & more frail; Parkinsonian tremor much worse. It was nerve-wracking enough when P escorted Mum upstairs last Thurs - eeek, no! The disorder! - to use home computer to check her email.)
I haven't busted out my DDP Yoga DVD's, but I did sneak out to yoga class last weekend; I wasn't about to put myself on display. Yes, I am VERY self-conscious around my size 4 MIL (who's almost as tall as I am).
But now to the REAL reason for the title of my post:
Scarlett's 1st 25-miler (High Roller 1/04/13)
Yes, my MIL was coming to town, so I ditched last-minute preparations & left... Yeah, Hubby was cool w/it too; I'd been talking about it for while since this relatively easy event over deep sandy trails on a private ranch would be the perfect opportunity to see if Miss Scarlett truly has endurance potential. I've ridden these trails many many times over the past 14 yrs David has hosted this event, so it would have been somewhat "boring" to repeat loops to do a 50. However, two loops to make 25 mi is "Just Right"! (I tell people all the time, the 1st 25 mi is FUN, the next 25 mi is WORK)
I counted it as a good omen that in this huge starting field, Scarlett came in 49th carrying her 49-yr old rider w/a perfectly respectable ride time of approx 4:30 (official ride results aren't posted yet, but you have 6 hrs to complete a 25-mi event, 12 hrs for a 50). I love this photo (of the mare) since she's stepping out nicely & you can see the lil' red ribbon in her tail sticking out just like Pippi Longstocking! (she's been known to threaten other horses - I wouldn't let her get away w/that sort of misbehavior but wanted to be "better safe than sorry" since occasionally overzealous racers can run up on your tail - that red ribbon is a warning: "May Kick")
This ride gets bigger almost every year w/125 riders kicking off the New Year right... However, Scarlotta WAS tired after slogging through all that deep sand, our TX weather turned from mild & pleasant on Sat to cool & drizzly Sun w/sprinkles of rain, so I packed it up Sun AM & came home to play hostess. And so it goes.
RYOR (Ride Your Own Ride) is an acronym we tell all new endurance riders... As gratifying as it is to be looked to for advice/suggestions/instruction
s "your mileage may vary" and you absolutely MUST pay close attention to the situation at hand, modify as needed, not stuff you & your horse into a "one-size-fits-all" template.
(3 more d of my MIL's visit - even though we've had a nice relaxed time, that old adage about fish n' houseguests is TRUE. Two wks is "two" much, but I am absolutely convinced of the rightness of my decision to give up our master BR downstairs, even though it's been awkward w/the 3 of us stuffed into upstairs BR's, utilizing 1 bathroom... She is even thinner & more frail; Parkinsonian tremor much worse. It was nerve-wracking enough when P escorted Mum upstairs last Thurs - eeek, no! The disorder! - to use home computer to check her email.)
I haven't busted out my DDP Yoga DVD's, but I did sneak out to yoga class last weekend; I wasn't about to put myself on display. Yes, I am VERY self-conscious around my size 4 MIL (who's almost as tall as I am).
But now to the REAL reason for the title of my post:
Scarlett's 1st 25-miler (High Roller 1/04/13)
Yes, my MIL was coming to town, so I ditched last-minute preparations & left... Yeah, Hubby was cool w/it too; I'd been talking about it for while since this relatively easy event over deep sandy trails on a private ranch would be the perfect opportunity to see if Miss Scarlett truly has endurance potential. I've ridden these trails many many times over the past 14 yrs David has hosted this event, so it would have been somewhat "boring" to repeat loops to do a 50. However, two loops to make 25 mi is "Just Right"! (I tell people all the time, the 1st 25 mi is FUN, the next 25 mi is WORK)
I counted it as a good omen that in this huge starting field, Scarlett came in 49th carrying her 49-yr old rider w/a perfectly respectable ride time of approx 4:30 (official ride results aren't posted yet, but you have 6 hrs to complete a 25-mi event, 12 hrs for a 50). I love this photo (of the mare) since she's stepping out nicely & you can see the lil' red ribbon in her tail sticking out just like Pippi Longstocking! (she's been known to threaten other horses - I wouldn't let her get away w/that sort of misbehavior but wanted to be "better safe than sorry" since occasionally overzealous racers can run up on your tail - that red ribbon is a warning: "May Kick")
This ride gets bigger almost every year w/125 riders kicking off the New Year right... However, Scarlotta WAS tired after slogging through all that deep sand, our TX weather turned from mild & pleasant on Sat to cool & drizzly Sun w/sprinkles of rain, so I packed it up Sun AM & came home to play hostess. And so it goes.
Say My Name
Thursday, January 16, 2014
(NOT)
...I was feeling SO much the tough & invincible one after shaking off Bad Chalupa Syndrome last weekend (apparent food poisoning after eating at my favorite ol' hole-in-the-wall Tex-Mex joint), but now it's a truly hideous oozing sore on my R shin?!?!? My best probable diagnosis is a spider bite, but whatever caused it, cellulitis is damned painful... Bad enough that I'm irritable & sleep-deprived, coughing & sneezing from the cedar pollen explosion, clenching all my sphincters to avoid humiliating myself any further - now I can't even hobble into the gym to relieve some stress! (I won't be able to resist posting the series of photos I've taken: from relatively innocent, itchy red sore to large area of nastiness - yes sirree, I'm taking antibiotics - even sent off a culture to be sure it's not MRSA or sumtin')
This misery has taken my mind off latest parenting-of-teenager drama (DS convinced his father to let him go to friend's house for sleepover, but they snuck out & got caught by Nice Dallas Police Officer @ 2 AM (I'm serious; it could have turned out MUCH worse than simply being escorted back to RP's home - I'd like to write that man a thank you card!) I can't decide whether my boy is truly his father's son, just diabolically manipulative enough to know which of my buttons to push, or Aw - still fundamentally mama's boy (when he doesn't want me to leave him @ barbershop last weekend etc)??!!?? The electronic game consoles still sit in my office, but I already caved & returned his iPhone - somehow seeing his lil' icon on the Find My Friends app is better than not knowing where he might be...
Here I was looking forward to 2014 - not like this! Bloated, miserable, congested, w/a throbbing R leg. Get me outta here.
(NOT)
...I was feeling SO much the tough & invincible one after shaking off Bad Chalupa Syndrome last weekend (apparent food poisoning after eating at my favorite ol' hole-in-the-wall Tex-Mex joint), but now it's a truly hideous oozing sore on my R shin?!?!? My best probable diagnosis is a spider bite, but whatever caused it, cellulitis is damned painful... Bad enough that I'm irritable & sleep-deprived, coughing & sneezing from the cedar pollen explosion, clenching all my sphincters to avoid humiliating myself any further - now I can't even hobble into the gym to relieve some stress! (I won't be able to resist posting the series of photos I've taken: from relatively innocent, itchy red sore to large area of nastiness - yes sirree, I'm taking antibiotics - even sent off a culture to be sure it's not MRSA or sumtin')
This misery has taken my mind off latest parenting-of-teenager drama (DS convinced his father to let him go to friend's house for sleepover, but they snuck out & got caught by Nice Dallas Police Officer @ 2 AM (I'm serious; it could have turned out MUCH worse than simply being escorted back to RP's home - I'd like to write that man a thank you card!) I can't decide whether my boy is truly his father's son, just diabolically manipulative enough to know which of my buttons to push, or Aw - still fundamentally mama's boy (when he doesn't want me to leave him @ barbershop last weekend etc)??!!?? The electronic game consoles still sit in my office, but I already caved & returned his iPhone - somehow seeing his lil' icon on the Find My Friends app is better than not knowing where he might be...
Here I was looking forward to 2014 - not like this! Bloated, miserable, congested, w/a throbbing R leg. Get me outta here.
...I was feeling SO much the tough & invincible one after shaking off Bad Chalupa Syndrome last weekend (apparent food poisoning after eating at my favorite ol' hole-in-the-wall Tex-Mex joint), but now it's a truly hideous oozing sore on my R shin?!?!? My best probable diagnosis is a spider bite, but whatever caused it, cellulitis is damned painful... Bad enough that I'm irritable & sleep-deprived, coughing & sneezing from the cedar pollen explosion, clenching all my sphincters to avoid humiliating myself any further - now I can't even hobble into the gym to relieve some stress! (I won't be able to resist posting the series of photos I've taken: from relatively innocent, itchy red sore to large area of nastiness - yes sirree, I'm taking antibiotics - even sent off a culture to be sure it's not MRSA or sumtin')
This misery has taken my mind off latest parenting-of-teenager drama (DS convinced his father to let him go to friend's house for sleepover, but they snuck out & got caught by Nice Dallas Police Officer @ 2 AM (I'm serious; it could have turned out MUCH worse than simply being escorted back to RP's home - I'd like to write that man a thank you card!) I can't decide whether my boy is truly his father's son, just diabolically manipulative enough to know which of my buttons to push, or Aw - still fundamentally mama's boy (when he doesn't want me to leave him @ barbershop last weekend etc)??!!?? The electronic game consoles still sit in my office, but I already caved & returned his iPhone - somehow seeing his lil' icon on the Find My Friends app is better than not knowing where he might be...
Here I was looking forward to 2014 - not like this! Bloated, miserable, congested, w/a throbbing R leg. Get me outta here.
Bleep Me, It's MRSA
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
I had a sneaking suspicion things were going to turn out this way; the lesion is improved but remains painful & seems exceptionally slow-healing...
Perhaps it is mostly psychosomatic that discomfort increased after I read the report; also has the side effect of making one feel like a leper from the public-health angle!
And yeah, I've got an appt w/my dermatologist next week... I'm sure he'll be thrilled to see something besides scouting for precancerous skin lesions!
Guess I'll limp by the gym today so my trainer will know I'm alive... Certainly he won't want me using any of his equipment w/my invisible miasma of microbes ;-) !!!
I did a warm-up DDP Yoga routine Sun night, promptly wimped out Mon night, started the 1st part of the Fat Burner routine last night but only got through 15 min - my leg started to throb. Took some ibuprofen & sat my a$$ back down, bummer!
Once again, you don't miss "normal life" until it's rudely interrupted. Bleepity-bleep-bleep-bleep!
I had a sneaking suspicion things were going to turn out this way; the lesion is improved but remains painful & seems exceptionally slow-healing...
Perhaps it is mostly psychosomatic that discomfort increased after I read the report; also has the side effect of making one feel like a leper from the public-health angle!
And yeah, I've got an appt w/my dermatologist next week... I'm sure he'll be thrilled to see something besides scouting for precancerous skin lesions!
Guess I'll limp by the gym today so my trainer will know I'm alive... Certainly he won't want me using any of his equipment w/my invisible miasma of microbes ;-) !!!
I did a warm-up DDP Yoga routine Sun night, promptly wimped out Mon night, started the 1st part of the Fat Burner routine last night but only got through 15 min - my leg started to throb. Took some ibuprofen & sat my a$$ back down, bummer!
Once again, you don't miss "normal life" until it's rudely interrupted. Bleepity-bleep-bleep-bleep!
Perhaps it is mostly psychosomatic that discomfort increased after I read the report; also has the side effect of making one feel like a leper from the public-health angle!
And yeah, I've got an appt w/my dermatologist next week... I'm sure he'll be thrilled to see something besides scouting for precancerous skin lesions!
Guess I'll limp by the gym today so my trainer will know I'm alive... Certainly he won't want me using any of his equipment w/my invisible miasma of microbes ;-) !!!
I did a warm-up DDP Yoga routine Sun night, promptly wimped out Mon night, started the 1st part of the Fat Burner routine last night but only got through 15 min - my leg started to throb. Took some ibuprofen & sat my a$$ back down, bummer!
Once again, you don't miss "normal life" until it's rudely interrupted. Bleepity-bleep-bleep-bleep!
Don't Look Down
Friday, January 31, 2014
...or, as that old quote attributed to Churchill declares: "If you're going through hell, keep going"
Suicidally Bad Attitude today (not that today is markedly worse than any other day over the past, errrr-ummm, 3 wks or so... Refilled my Bactrim Rx w/moderate grumbling as the MRSA abscess on R shin lingers on - oh yeah, it's getting better slowly but surely - but my dermatologist (whom I saw yesterday, joking that I'd brought him something INTERESTING to look at rather than the boring ol' precancerous-lesion skin check - but yeah, he zapped several places on hands, arms, & chest) advised me to stay on antibiotics until the blasted thing completely dries up. No gym, no yoga studio; it's as if I can feel the pressure building up in my cranium. Last night I did 10 min of tai chi which I'm ashamed to say caused my deconditioned carcass to break a sweat.
I have been lying on my acupressure mat for 10-15 min @ bedtime which helps me slightly to destress... Brewing up big cups o' kava tea - I'll try everything; bring it on!
It's both a relief AND a disappointment that highly-rated shrink who evaluated Z last week saw nothing that warranted medication (she had been speculating during our visit that he might have a mild form of ADD, but backed away from that diagnosis after whaddaya know, actually EXAMINING him) - she recommended further talk therapy which he now of course is balking at... It would have been a relief in one sense to dispense a tablet to him (maybe one for me as well ;-) TEENAGERS!!!
Instead I'll keep pacing along my tightrope, avoiding staring into the abyss.
...or, as that old quote attributed to Churchill declares: "If you're going through hell, keep going"
Suicidally Bad Attitude today (not that today is markedly worse than any other day over the past, errrr-ummm, 3 wks or so... Refilled my Bactrim Rx w/moderate grumbling as the MRSA abscess on R shin lingers on - oh yeah, it's getting better slowly but surely - but my dermatologist (whom I saw yesterday, joking that I'd brought him something INTERESTING to look at rather than the boring ol' precancerous-lesion skin check - but yeah, he zapped several places on hands, arms, & chest) advised me to stay on antibiotics until the blasted thing completely dries up. No gym, no yoga studio; it's as if I can feel the pressure building up in my cranium. Last night I did 10 min of tai chi which I'm ashamed to say caused my deconditioned carcass to break a sweat.
I have been lying on my acupressure mat for 10-15 min @ bedtime which helps me slightly to destress... Brewing up big cups o' kava tea - I'll try everything; bring it on!
It's both a relief AND a disappointment that highly-rated shrink who evaluated Z last week saw nothing that warranted medication (she had been speculating during our visit that he might have a mild form of ADD, but backed away from that diagnosis after whaddaya know, actually EXAMINING him) - she recommended further talk therapy which he now of course is balking at... It would have been a relief in one sense to dispense a tablet to him (maybe one for me as well ;-) TEENAGERS!!!
Instead I'll keep pacing along my tightrope, avoiding staring into the abyss.
Suicidally Bad Attitude today (not that today is markedly worse than any other day over the past, errrr-ummm, 3 wks or so... Refilled my Bactrim Rx w/moderate grumbling as the MRSA abscess on R shin lingers on - oh yeah, it's getting better slowly but surely - but my dermatologist (whom I saw yesterday, joking that I'd brought him something INTERESTING to look at rather than the boring ol' precancerous-lesion skin check - but yeah, he zapped several places on hands, arms, & chest) advised me to stay on antibiotics until the blasted thing completely dries up. No gym, no yoga studio; it's as if I can feel the pressure building up in my cranium. Last night I did 10 min of tai chi which I'm ashamed to say caused my deconditioned carcass to break a sweat.
I have been lying on my acupressure mat for 10-15 min @ bedtime which helps me slightly to destress... Brewing up big cups o' kava tea - I'll try everything; bring it on!
It's both a relief AND a disappointment that highly-rated shrink who evaluated Z last week saw nothing that warranted medication (she had been speculating during our visit that he might have a mild form of ADD, but backed away from that diagnosis after whaddaya know, actually EXAMINING him) - she recommended further talk therapy which he now of course is balking at... It would have been a relief in one sense to dispense a tablet to him (maybe one for me as well ;-) TEENAGERS!!!
Instead I'll keep pacing along my tightrope, avoiding staring into the abyss.
No comments:
Post a Comment