…left on my washing machine cycle, which is the time I have allotted myself to dictate a quick blog post.
Time to make a decision about next weekend’s ride which is about a 4 1/2 hour haul (just SW of Austin on a private ranch - a beautiful place where I have not been in quite a while because they do not allow dogs. I’d estimate at least 30% of we endurance riders travel with our “camp dogs” - it felt very odd 2 weeks ago for me to get in my truck without any canine companionship!
I continue to suffer spasms of regret and guilt each morning when I roll out of bed, start to clear my foggy brain, and realize they’re all still gone - Clarice, my sister Linda, and Dr Conway most recently, but that huge tidal wave of loss looms behind them. I have to keep stumbling forward to avoid that crushing weight…
(Washing machine just finished up, but I’m gonna give myself a few more minutes to finish what I started)
Baraq made me question my commitment to endurance with his antics last month, but yesterday I took Alex-mule out for a very pleasant short training ride with my buddy Sam. He was planning to go to next weekend’s ride but now his wife has to have surgery, so it all depends on her scheduling. I just don’t know if it will be worth it for me when all I’m really up for is a one-loop intro ride. I’ve already vowed that I’m not going to offer to haul Baraq for Christina to ride - I’m still a little annoyed that she ignored all my hints about contributions to the Bo Surgery Fund. Still deciding how I want to broach the subject when I finally see her face-to-face? Not that I was expecting her to pay any significant percentage of Bo’s tab, but even a few hundred bucks would’ve been a nice gesture, considering I was planning to return Bo to her for her daughter to ride. Maybe I’m the one that’s completely off base here, but Christina is not dumb - she’s well aware that horses are an expensive hobby!
Not surprisingly, the ride manager for our ride at the end of March has already asked me to work a day/ride a day in Dr. Conway’s conspicuous absence. I guess that’s a handy built-in excuse for Yours Truly, but I’m bracing myself for many more such requests - after all, we can’t hold an event without veterinary supervision.
I had an odd dream last night in which I was able to attend Dr. Conway’s funeral - my ex took an unflattering photo of me (is there any other kind these days?) And the Slut actually came over to me to chit-chat - I was casting about desperately for a means to escape!
But here are some nice photos from my ride yesterday
May I say Alex mule is a handsome critter? And what a pretty day for a ride, too.
ReplyDeleteThose waves of grief... virtual hugs... it's only going to get worse for those of us left behind, isn't it? As for the odd dreams, boy can I relate... obviously not the same people in mine as in yours, but those "life events" mixed in with significant people in our own lives, jumbled up, the venues changed, etc. Sleep, knitting it all up in symbols through our dreams.
Here's hoping you have more pleasant dreams as the nights move on. And that the laundry was properly done!
MorticiaAddams
ReplyDeleteI don't have a dog but I do like to go to places that allow them such as Rural King and pet stores. We used to take our chinchillas into pet stores and they enjoyed being fussed over. They are very cute little animals. I don't understand why pets aren't allowed if you are staying outdoors.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you will be very busy due to Dr. Conway's death.
Your ride looked nice and I also think Alex is cute. Those ears and that little tuft of hair sticking up between them do it for me.
I am also having some weird dreams. Strange.
Unfortunately too many riders do not restrain their "camp dogs" propertly - not only running wild & picking fights with their neighbors, but their nastiest habit being certain male dogs urinating on good, expensive hay! (Most folks will unload & stack a bale or two on the ground for easier feeding access) Storm Ranch is also a working cattle ranch, cannot afford to have unruly dogs chasing the livestock either.
DeleteThat makes sense. Most of our neighbors are not responsible dog owners. Two of them have multiple dogs and they don't train them. The neighbor north of us has at least 4 dogs and when they are gone they bark constantly. We are not real close but you can still hear them in our house they are so loud. Sometimes it sounds like they are having a huge dog fight and Benny says that is their reaction when the neighbors come home. The neighbor to the east has had 3 dogs and 3 cats and he is one of those people who thinks that dogs should find their own food. The neighbor to the west had dogs in the teens and thought the same thing. In my areas most of the people who have cattle ranches and horse ranches have their own working dogs. They seem to like blue heelers which I think are extremely cute.
DeleteMy comments keep disappearing!
ReplyDeleteDon't have guilt on not attending the funeral. That was quite a haul to make to get there and attending to the living rather than appeasing the conventions of a wake seems more appropriate.
I cannot explain how I can come straight from the “Comments moderation” page of my very own blog, yet my iPad won’t let me post as me, myself, THE AUTHOR??!!?? Nevermind that it does the same thing when I try to comment on my friends’ blogs…
ReplyDelete